What I Need From You On A Bad Day
Patience. Everything will require a hundred times more energy than usual today. I may not be able to do everything you expect of me. I may not be able to accept your rational answers to what I’m struggling with. Please don’t get annoyed. I’m trying.
Space. Please don’t push me to do things that I don’t want to do. I may need time alone. As long as I’m safe, just leave me for a bit. You can come and check on me. I just need some time to recover.
Reassurance. Chances are, I can’t stop worrying about something. I probably think you hate me too, because I know I am making your day harder. I might need you to tell me a hundred times that you don’t hate me. It’s nothing that you’ve done wrong. It’s just my head.
Encouragement. If I have breakfast, that could be a big achievement. Validate this. Recognise the small things that I manage to do in the day. Tell me I’m doing well. I won’t believe you, but it’s nice to hear it.
Practical help. If you have the time, I may be panicking over small things that I don’t have the capacity to deal with right now. Like chores, or decisions I need to make, or correspondence I need to send. If possible, relieve a bit of the pressure and help me with this.
Hope. Remind me that I don’t feel like this every day. Remind me that tomorrow may be brighter. That I can’t possibly know what the future holds. Sit with me and look through my scrapbook, or at photos of happier times.
Reminders. Remind me that I am not a failure. Remind me that I am loved. Remind me that I am not a burden. Remind me that I am worthy.
Talk to me. Tell me nicely if you’re finding things too much and you need space. Tell me that it’s not my fault, but you need to look after yourself too. Tell me that you’re going out for an hour and when you get back we can watch a film together for example. Just be honest with me.
And please remember, I am so grateful for your kindness. Thank you for trying your hardest. It makes the hard days just that little bit easier.